HomeTagsPosts tagged with "funny"

funny

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We can’t believe we didn’t think of this. It’s totally genius.

A new website called shipyourenemiesglitter.com promises to wreck your worst enemy’s day by sending them “so much glitter in an envelope that they’ll be finding that sh** everywhere for weeks.”

The company will also send a note to the person who deserves the wrath of glitter with a note explaining exactly why, which will be mixed in with the glitter “thus increasing maximum spillage”.

The website has been so popular that ordering has been suspended as they work through their huge orders, or in their own words: “You guys have a sick fascination with shipping people glitter. We’ve received all order and working through them. There was a tonne so be patient.”

We sort of hope we’ve annoyed someone so much that they send us glitter. 

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If you love the Northern Irish twang, you have to take a look at this.

We can't guarantee you'll have any idea what is actually being said, but just relax and bask in the sounds of this Derry teenager's glorious accent!

The UTV news clip has gone viral since it aired last night – we wonder if the poor lad knows he's a national hero!

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With most parts of Ireland blanketed in snow or ice this morning, the reactions so far have been somewhat mixed.

Sligo man Alan was in awe of the Frozen-style weather outside his house… but his roomies aren't QUITE so impressed!

Don't mind them Alan, they're just being boring!

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Chrissy Teigan has found herself going viral – for her crying face. Minutes after her husband John Legend won the Golden Globe for Best Original Song in a Motion Picture, Chrissy’s tearful reaction had spread across the internet like wildfire.

Twitter took hold of Chrissy’s rather awkward facial expression and made many, many jokes out of it. Always a good sport, Chrissy took to Twitter to acknowledge the meme, saying: “Sorry I don’t practice my cry face okay … It’s been 5 minutes and I’m a meme.” 

She later shared a photo of her and John doing the cry face on Instagram, accompanied by lots of tearful emojis. 

We love how well she took it. We’re not sure how we’d feel if our ‘cry face’ was splashed all over the internet! 

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Much as we'd like to think of ourselves as cool calm and collected beings, we know in reality we're far from that!

So we're a little delighted to see that we're not the only ones who've ever gotten caught rocking out a little TOO hard to our "Pump Up The Jam" playlist while at the gym.

This woman secretly filmed her husband bopping along to Bruno Mars and Mark Ronson's Uptown Funk, all the while giggling along at his moves.

We wonder what revenge he has planned for her!

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Let's face it, sex is never like it is in the movies. There's no dramatic music, no intense eye contact – in fact, if there was, we'd find it all a bit weird!

The kind of sex most of us have experienced can be broken down into one of ten categories… here's our definitive list.

1. Lazy sex
No bells and whistles, just keep it simple!

2. Morning sex
Usually initiated while at least one of you is still half asleep. "Did we have sex earlier?"

3. Drunk sex
All those circus-style positions you'd never try while sober? Ohhh, they're gonna happen now!

4. Hungover sex
The only cure! Unless you're the kind of person that can't stand human contact while hungover… then it's a no-no.

5. "We really shouldn't" sex
Whether you're somewhere you shouldn't be or WITH someone you shouldn't be, forbidden sex has that certain edge to it.

6. Awkward sex
Weird noises, clumsiness, falling off the bed… we've all been that soldier.

7. Bad sex
Sometimes it's just… well… BAD.

8. Make-up sex
You two have just had a massive argument, and whether you've talked things out or not, the time for great sex is NOW.

9. Swanky hotel sex
Giant bed, giant pillows, amazing view… whip off that hotel bathrobe and get to it!

10. Best ever sex
If you're lucky you'll get great sex on the regular, but "best ever" sex only comes around once in a blue moon. Savour it!

 

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It would seem that his wife, Lara Stone’s steamy new advert with Justin Bieber for Calvin Klein isn’t far from David Walliams’ mind if this latest tweet is anything to go by!

The comedian, who has been married to Lara since 2010, posted an image of the very sexy ad on his Twitter account and joked: “Why has someone photoshopped @justinbieber’s head onto what is clearly my body?” At least he’s taking it well!

Later, David retweeted a photoshopped image of his head on Justin’s body, which we have to say is a little unsettling! But still hilarious.

Well played, David!

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2014 is almost over so we have collected our favourite viral videos from the year! Is your favourite in here?

Be prepared to LOL…a lot!

1. Max really, really can't kayak

2. Irish girl's ice-cream gets pooped on by a bird

3. Girl's shameless selfie spree is caught on camera…by her dad

4. Let's just say this little girl needs to let Frozen go!

5. This little boy is the cutest thing to happen all year

6. Cheryl's reaction to her embarrassing moment

7. The Leaving Cert never looked so terrifying! 

8. When life with our parents was summed up so perfectly

9. The best (but worst) Ice Bucket Challenge EVER

10. When selfies go very, very, wrong..

 

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A DJ named Mac Lethal (we’re not judging you Mac…much) was asked by a fan to write a song for his cheating girlfriend and break-up with her for him.

Here is the email he got:

“Dear Mac,

Today I found out my girlfriend Nicole is cheating on me. How I found out was a little weird. I found a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios in the sink. The thing is, she doesn’t fu**ing eat gluten.

I got suspicious and broke into her Facebook account while she was at the Taylor Swift concert, and discovered that she’d cheated on me with six different guys! Please make a video that I can send to her as my way of breaking up with her.”

Darryl.

So…Mac Lethal obliged. And it may be the best thing ever. 

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We all know what a trying time our monthly visitor can be. On top of the agonising, uncomfortable pain, there is never-ending cravings, *slight* mood swings and other unsavoury delights to deal with. 

This hilarious video shows what it would be like if our period was a person – and it’s just as annoying as you might expect! 

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Ever since Sesame Street introduced us to the mind-bending wonder that was dogs with human hands, we've always found it juuuust a little creepy.

So we're not sure how to feel about this Christmas dinner video from pet food company Freshpet, which features an array of very dignified cats and dogs enjoying Christmas dinner.

There's the cat who rocks a sweater vest…

The ghetto bulldog…

And the surly teen…

Even though the human hands are freaking us out QUITE a bit, we have to admit this video made us laugh… especially the dog casually petting his OWN PET DOG. So meta.

 

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This woman just got served!

We're all guilty of being a little picky when it comes to choosing the right guy, but we hope we'd never be as fickle as this woman who posted to a forum asking for advice on how to find a man with a "$500k annual salary." 

Luckily, one clever man threw some serious shade with the perfect reply!

The woman's post began: "I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I’m greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York. My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?"

What we really love though, is this amazing reply from a man claiming to be the CEO of banking and finance company JP Morgan:

"Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.

My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.

Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money” : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.

However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year.

Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a “trading position”.

If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term – same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”.

Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income.This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps.

signed,
J.P. Morgan CEO
"

ZING!

 

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