HomeTagsPosts tagged with "funny"

funny

by

We bet this husband won’t be getting any for a while!

After getting tired of his wife’s excuses not to have sex with him, this husband came up with the brilliant (read: stupid) idea of creating a spreadsheet.

The spreadsheet charts the dates and excuses made by his wife not to get down and dirty with him.

It was actually the wife that shared the image with the internet, uploading it to Reddit and writing: “Yesterday, while in a taxi on the way to the airport, husband sends a message to my work email which is attached to my phone. He’s never done this, we always communicate in person or by text. I open it up and it’s a sarcastic diatribe basically saying he won’t miss me for the 10 days that I’m gone. Attached is a spreadsheet of all the times he has tried to initiate sex since June 1st, with a column for my ‘excuses’ using verbatim quotes of why I didn’t want to have sex at that very moment.”

Somehow, we’re thinking this didn’t help his cause much.

Trending

by

It may have been a while since Made in Chelsea’s Spencer and Louise were dating – but that doesn’t mean all has been forgiven!

The pair have been filming in New York for the past few weeks, and it would seem as if Louise has had her fair share of Spencer at this stage (can you blame her?)

Louise’s friend, Binky, uploaded this hilarious snap to her Instagram in which you can see Louise giving Spencer the finger, we love it!

This makes us even more excited about the upcoming season…! Could she have fallen for Spennie's charms again? 

Trending

Bored of using your hand to pour your beer? Why don’t you try pour it with your head?

Trending

Watch what happens when this man tries to turn his chair into a ride using two fire extinguishers. 

Trending

by

It’s not surprising that Caroline Wozniacki would still be hurting after her ex-fiancé, Rory, called off their wedding recently (after the invites went out…)

The tennis star shared an image of herself dressed very pretty on her Instagram page with the slightly hilarious caption: “Out and about in Instanbul. It’s been 3 years since I have worn heels on a normal day out. #feelsgood #looksgood #shopping #highheels #sun.”

Enjoy it girl, you look amazing!

Trending

by

It's normal to worry a little, but some of us go overboard. If you find yourself compulsively worrying, you will probably have some of these traits:

1. You find it hard to get to sleep
Your brain doesn’t switch off at night, you spend hours tossing and turning  at night trying to fall asleep. You’ve had tried everything, but thoughts just keep racing through your head. You end up staying up all night watching the Breaking Bad box set again to get yourself to sleep.

3141

2. You read way too much into your dreams
Any time you have a dream and you happen to remember it, you think that there is some deep existential meaning behind it. Usually it’s just a lot of random stuff that when it’s put together makes absolutely no sense.

giphy

 

3. At the smallest sign of sickness, you have to check all your symptoms online
Worriers are known hypochondriacs and when you get even the smallest dose of something, you feel like you are going to die of a fever. Times have changed and we have medicine for everything now, the worst advice you can give worriers is to check their symptoms online, it will just make them think they have loads of diseases they have never heard of. 

tumblr_lz32dbXK6f1qdr5i8

4. You spend too much time dwelling on compliments
“What did they mean by that? ” What are they trying to say?”. You think that there is some secret code you have to unlock to find out what they really mean. Usually when someone gives you a compliment they are just being nice and they don’t actually have an alterior motive behind it.

thanks

5. Interviews are your worst nightmare
You go through every possible outcome that could happen and only spend time on the bad ones. This can put you in a very negative mindset and the worst thing you thought that would happen actually did.

uKYXuYd

 

6. When you hear someone laughing you actually think they’re talking about you
Not in a vain way, as in, of course they’re talking about me, but more that they’re constantly judging you in some way. You look at what you’re wearing or how your hair looks and wonder if it could be that. Their friends just told them a joke, but worriers are constantly paranoid.

stop_laughing_stop_it

7. Worrying about one small thing and then it gets stuck in your head for the rest of the day
You have one small doubt about something and then you can’t seem to shake it for the rest of the day. It constantly reappears throughout the day like a fly that won’t go away.  The only relief you have is actually confronting the thing you’re worried about which is an even more daunting task.

tumblr_m2v960r7FU1r7z553

8. You’re a first class procrastinator
One of the most clear cut signs that you’re a worrier is that you constantly procrastinate. You will put off anything and everything, just so you won’t  have to deal with it straight away. You inevitably end up leaving everything until the last minute when you don’t have time to worry.

27e

 

9. You act like you’re not phased by criticism, but really it eats you up inside
Someone was actually honest and they gave you constructive criticism, you act as if that you’re ok with it, but really you’re dying inside. “How could they be so right?” They’re really only making an observation, but you make out as if it’s a permanent scar on your self esteem.

9) Ross I'm Fine

10. Change is your mortal enemy
You have a routine that you stick to and anytime there is a change, is a serious spanner in the works. You don’t really deal with change well and it takes you a while to fully adjust to new surroundings.

tumblr_mlkg24yc851s9prw9o1_500

11. Daydreaming always makes things worse
You’re not like everyone else you don’t daydream about sunshine and lollipops, you think about all the bad things that could happen to you on your way home.  If it’s going to be raining and if you will make it in time for your bus, all the signs of a true worrier.

frabz-is-daydreaming-falls-into-a-coma-d6b2f9

12. Even when everything is going well, you’re convinced that things will turn out pear-shaped
So you’re actually doing well and getting on in life, but you’re still convinced that somehow it’s all going to go horribly wrong. You always think that someone is going to come in an tell you that it’s all over…

tumblr_marxd5hLxC1qb9x3vo1_500via our content partner CT

Trending

Bored of using your hand to pour your beer? Why don’t you try pour it with your head?

Trending

There is nothing like a good twin prank.

Trending

by

There are some things in life that truly shake us ladies to the core. Many are irrational, but that makes them no less scary.

1. Being A Cat Lady Forever

catperson

Cats, cats everywhere…

2. Being An Ugly Bridesmaid

cinderella4

Being a bridesmaid is a catch twenty two. On the one hand, you’re flattered that someone would ask you to be their right hand woman on the biggest and most important day of their lives. On the other hand, you’re terrified that you’ll have to spend a day being photographed in the ugliest dress known to mankind, whilst the bride stands beside you in an attempt to look even more beautiful.

3. Childbirth

tumblr_inline_n8ecpcIb231r6jzi4

Oh god it’s so scary looking….agh!

4. Realising He’s Not The One

brad_006

We’ve all seen the fairy tales, read the books, attended the weddings. We know that true love actually does exist, apparently. We now just need to find it and not mess up along the way. Our greatest love related fear, is doing what they all do in films and marry the first man that comes our way, only to discover that he’s really not right for you.

5. Being The Ugly Duckling

lies-women-tell-fugly-ugly-white-lies-gif

What if if we’re the ugly ducklings of the family or even worse, our friend group? What if, even though we’re aware that our family are good looking, we actually think that we ourselves, are better looking than we actually are. What if we’re totally rank? Better go and scrutinize every single picture ever taken, for definite evidence.

6. Kids

1501806_o1

Just kids in general. They’re loud and cry a lot. Then there’s the whole issue of having to give up a large portion of your life to care for them.

7. Waking Up With Wrinkles

gif-king-5ec29bf09e26517b3ac000ef7721171b

Ever since we’ve poked the lines on our Grandmothers face, we’ve been more than a little scared of wrinkling. Moisturise. It’s key in anti ageing, so they say. Yet, despite going to bed every night with a three inch layer of Astral on our faces, we can’t help but fear waking up with a perfectly ruled face.

8. Getting Grey Hairs

tyra

Mention balding to any man and watch the colour drain from his face. Priceless. Watch them mention grey hairs to us and you’ll pretty much get the same reaction.

9. Being Stuck In A Dead End Job Forever

giphy

We’ve all had to work crappy jobs at one stage or another. Bad money, customers you want to slap. It’s on the worst days that you being to ponder if this is all there is. What if you spend the rest of your life in this miserable, degrading job? Best not to think about that.

10. Our Metabolism Slowing Down Drastically

ibknaWXycTb9Pn

Now, that’s not to say that we’re completely oblivious to the effects of eating one too many Snackboxes. It’s just that after reading one too many ‘articles’ on ‘celebrities’ and their daily struggles with weight gain, that we start to wonder when we’ll have to live on a diet of baby food and fear. It’s coming…

via our content partner CT

Trending

This sweet video of a group of disabled dogs in wheelchairs playing in a field in Germany is sure to warm your heart. Just like any other dogs, these pups love running around and playing a good game of fetch with each other, and we think it’s so great to see them getting the chance to do what dogs do best. What a clever invention these little doggy wheelchairs are!

Trending

by

Everyone has a little bit of Milhouse in them, and it's nothing to be ashamed of! Milhouse is awesome. 

1. You’re The Sidekick In Your Own Life

milhouse simpsons

2. You Can’t Flirt

milhouse flirt

 

A shift of the eyebrow, a tearful session of begging, grasping their pants as they try to leave – yeah, flirting isn’t exactly your forte. “Do… um, did you, uh, fall from heaven? It’s… are you an angel? Um, I’m sorry… I just like your face.”

3. You Can’t Handle Being Alone

simpsons milhouse lonely

 

When you can’t see your best friend, or can’t even talk to them, it’s the worst experience ever. Who else can listen to you about this horrible time in your life? Definitely not Martin Prince, he’s probably studying

4. You’ll Do Anything For Your Crush

simpsons milhouse lisa

 

Your crush always wants aspects of you and your personality in their prospective partner. Dammit Lisa, can’t you see the Milhouse love right in front of you? *cries*

5. You’re Always Trying To Improve Yourself

future milhouse

 

6. Sometimes You Lose The Plot

milhouse

 

You’re usually a pretty happy-go-lucky person in your day-to-day life. However, that can all change. If one more person annoys you, and you’re already on the brink, you can flip your shit. Watch out when Milhouse gets angry. You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry.

7. You’re Gullible

simpsons milhouse

 

You tend to believe what your trusted friend/family member tells you, even if it isn’t at all feasible. You just hope that they wouldn’t lie to you, you’ll question it later when you’ve had time to have a bit of a think.

8. You Get Yourself Into Awkward Situations

simpsons milhouse nelson

 

You put your foot in your mouth, usually daily, if not, you’ll trip yourself up or just push someone to the brink of knocking your teeth out. Don’t provoke Nelson, it’s not worth it.

9. Nobody Likes You

nobody likes milhouse

 

That may not be entirely accurate because you’re pretty awesome, but it does feel like that on occasion. Anyone who doesn’t like you is wrong, so that’s okay.

10. But Despite Everything, You’re An Eternal Optimist

simpsons milhouse

So, congratulations, you’re pretty darn cool. Bonus, Bart can’t live without you. You do you, Milhouse!

via our content partner CT

 

 

Trending

by

Emma Stone evidently doesn’t think too much of the charms of one Colin Firth.

The actress appeared on the Late Show with David Letterman where she revealed what she really thinks of her Magic in the Moonlight co-star.

When David says: “He’s a tool,” Emma agrees, saying: “He’s a nightmare … he’s a toolbag.”

Hmm, we’re sure Emma was just joking…hopefully!

Trending