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There's being horny, and then there's faking your own death to pursue said horniness and sexual urges. I mean, Valentine's Day is tomorrow so maybe take notes if you're in this lady's boat.

Seems extreme? According to the Guardian, a nun named Joan of Leeds faked her death to escape a convent after she decided the celibate life didn't quite suit her, back in 1318. Now THAT'S a boss b*tch.

A team of researchers at the University of York found Joan's story in the margins of a register in a Latin note scribed by Archbishop William Melton, who wrote about the "scandalous rumour". 

Melton elaborated on Joan's incredible story, saying that she, “impudently cast aside the propriety of religion and the modesty of her sex."

“Out of a malicious mind simulating a bodily illness, she pretended to be dead… crafted a dummy in the likeness of her body in order to mislead the devoted faithful and she had no shame in procuring its burial in a sacred space amongst the religious of that place”

Archbishop Melton was entirely shooketh by her behaviour, claiming that her actions were "cunning” and “nefarious.” Yikes.

So she faked a disease, buried a dummy which looked the image of her, and escaped the convent to fornicate and spread her wild oats. That's not all, folks…

Melton's notes on her faked death continued; “Seduced by indecency, she involved herself irreverently and perverted her path of life arrogantly to the way of carnal lust and away from poverty and obedience."

“Having broken her vows and discarded the religious habit, she now wanders at large to the notorious peril to her soul and to the scandal of all of her order.” She swapped poverty and total obedience for some decent coitus and one-night-stands with medieval f*ckboys, basically.

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The Sun reported over the weekend something so SCANDALOUS, that we can barely utter the words. Don't worry, we'll manage.

They claimed that Hollywood A-listers Brad Pitt and Charlize Theron were the new power couple of 2019, and people damn near lost their minds;

“They have been casually seeing each other for nearly a month now," a source close to the alleged couple said. "They’ve been friends for some time—ironically through Sean Penn, Theron's ex—but things have developed.”

However, now People and Entertainment Tonight have published reports with new details stating that Theron and Pitt were always just friends, and we're more than a tad disappointed.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by Annahar Lifestyle (@annaharlifestyle) on

According to People;

"The two “did a shoot together six months ago for Breitling watches. They have not been out together recently, and were never dating. Reports of them being involved romantically are false,” the source alleges.

It would be truly spicy if the unnaturally attractive duo became more than just friends, we must admit. But no pressure, of course.

The pair modelled together for the famous watch brand together and sparks were a-FLYIN'…

Entertainment Tonight's source was much more open to the possibility of something romantic happening later down the line, but sadly not for the moment;

"Brad and Charlize have known each other for years and recently became even better friends after working together [on the Breitling watches shoot]," its source said. "They enjoy each other's company and connect on many levels."

"Brad and Charlize have a lot of mutual friends and share their love of acting, but neither of them are ready for a serious relationship right now. They are both very single at the moment so it's no surprise people are talking romance," the insider added.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by Brad Pitt (@bradpittoffcial) on

"They truly would make a Hollywood power couple, but at this point, they're friends." ET's source also said that Pitt "isn't looking for an actress as a lifetime partner."

HEY BRAD, we're available and not in the industry…

brad pitt kiss GIF

 

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There’s nothing like a new candle to help a home make the reluctant transition from Summer to Autumn/Winter.

But while the darker evenings already have us craving rhubarb and blackberry-type scents, we can’t say we’ve ever wished our rooms smelled like laptops.

A South Carolinian Apple accessory store is selling “New Mac” scented candles to help people get their favourite computer smell without actually having to invest in another MacBook.

As random they are, the unique candles – which contain hints of mint, peach, basil, lavender, mandarin and sage – have been a huge hit with Twelve South’s customers, with the first batch of New Mac scents selling out in just one day.

According to the store’s website, the $24 soy wax candles will be back in stock later this month.

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His wife may be one of Instagram’s most popular users, but that doesn’t mean Kanye West has quite got the hang of the ‘gram just yet.

Upon learning that the controversial rapper had finally created a verified account on the picture sharing site, the world quickly began to wonder what would be the focus of Yeezy’s first post.

But now that said post has arrived, it’s safe to say no one could have predicted its contents – a screenshot of the Johnny Cab scene from Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Total Recall.

 

A photo posted by Kanye West (@kanyewest) on

Because there is no caption accompanying the shot – how alt – us mere humans must now sit and marvel over the surely unreachable artistic state Ye has so kindly offered us a glimpse of. 

Feat image: The Huffington Post

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Watch these three random guys sing together. Amazing!

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