In a moving essay for Elle Magazine, Kesha has spoken about her eating disorder as well as her time in rehab.
The Timber singer revealed in the weeks prior to her treatment, she said she felt that her whole body was “shutting down”, and knew it wasn’t because of her touring schedule. The singer admitted that she was worried about what people might think about her going to rehab.
"Sure, I've written songs about partying, but my dirty little secret is that I'm actually incredibly responsible. I take my music and career very seriously, and certainly didn't land in this situation from partying. But I was cut off from the outside world and I imagined people making up stories at a time when what I really needed was support."
The 27-year-old revealed that she felt pressurised by her job to be as skinny as possible.
"I've always tried to be a crusader for loving yourself, but I'd been finding it harder and harder to do personally. I felt like part of my job was to be as skinny as possible, and to make that happen, I had been abusing my body. I just wasn't giving it the energy it needed to keep me healthy and strong."
Kesha went on to criticise the music industry for the way it compares female artists to one another especially when it comes to their appearance. The singer said this only made things worse for her body insecurities.
"The music industry has set unrealistic expectations for what a body is supposed to look like, and I started becoming overly critical of my own body because of that. I felt like people were always lurking, trying to take pictures of me with the intention of putting them up online or printing them in magazines and making me look terrible. I became scared to go in public, or even use the internet. I may have been paranoid, but I also saw and heard enough hateful things to fuel that paranoia."
Kesha spent two months in rehab and felt she is able to focus more on her music because of it. The singer said sharing her story has been scary, but hopes that it will help other people facing similar issues.
"I'm not fully fixed—I am a person in progress—but I want to be part of the solution, not part of the problem. Even I need to be reminded that we are who we are," she said. "And when I say that, I f–king mean it, now more than ever."
