Holiday souvenirs are a pain to buy. For one thing, you have no money left when you finally remember to buy something and you never have any room in your bag. Sure it’s already full of cheap booze!

So remember that when your friend hands you one of these gifts:

Fake Louis Vuitton bag
Seriously, if they can’t get you the real thing they shouldn’t have bothered.

Stick of Rock
They make your hands, face and hair sticky.

Shot glass
We’ll forgive them if they supply the alcohol as well.

A key ring
Lest we forget they went to a certain place.

A fridge magnet
See above.

A cup
Even if actually makes it back unscathed, we don’t have room for the ones we already have.

Ornaments
Ornaments require dusting.

Pen with their holiday location written on it
Oh, jeez how thoughtful.

A ‘I heart’ t-shirt
The only place we will ever wear this is to bed.

A teddy bear
What are we, five?